“Ah, you’re going to be a lot of useless data, aren’t you?” – Victoria Franks, 1313: Frankenqueen
As a companion to my Netflix viewing of Guillermo del Toro’s larger than life version of Frankenstein, I also indulged in another Mary Shelley inspired opus, David DeCoteau’s 1313: Frankenqueen (2012). Like del Toro, DeCoteau definitely has his own style and he also worships at the altar of a really good set piece. Of course, DeCoteau’s props are all human, involving the forms of very smooth and cleanly muscular jock-types.
Here a bevy of those prototypes are recruited as weekend lab rats for Victoria Franks (Helene Udy), a brilliant plastic surgeon. Udy (My Bloody Valentine, The Dead Zone) is obviously having a blast in the titular role, both pithily analyzing and enthusiastically dispatching her charges. In fact, it is hard to determine what is more painful for the young men in her employ, the rigorous work-outs that their host puts them through or the barbed retorts that she frequently delivers about their intellect and worthiness for her program.
Otherwise, as expected from a DeCoteau feature, there are long sequences of the male cast wandering, in perfectly shaven fugues, throughout Franks’ mansion. Since his first male erotica opus, Voodoo Academy in 2000, these dream sequences have been a staple in his films. One could even argue that they put DeCoteau in the auteur league as they are so infused with his creative identity.
His frequent themes of revenge and underdog upmanship are also in full force here.
Industriously, these simple plot points and a single location, along with a rotating cast of female genre performers & toned studs, created an celluloid empire, with close to 30 films done with the same stylistic precepts.
Of course, while there is nary a bare male buttock in sight, one must admire the art of the fluff on display in these titles. With almost academic precision, the performers arrange their pouched jewels, allowing for a lasting impression that the scenarios themselves don’t always achieve.
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