So, this is just like the time I went out with the drooling maniac that my mother (the lesbian prostitute nun) wanted to marry. Even though she didn’t realize it at the time, I was doing her a favor.
Likewise, the charming gents of the amazing podcast Astro Radio Z and myself have taken a bullet for all cinematic voyeurs out there by diving into the entire Witchcraft series! Yes, watching the oftentimes unbelievably boring entries in this soft core horror enterprise was both a horror and a joy – something we all point out in this the (gasp!) final episode covering the last two (ahem!) films in the series.
So, dive in – and if you find that you need a warlock to help pull you out of the mucky abyss – please DON’T call someone named Will Spanner!
Let’s face it, half the fun of horror and exploitation is seeing some hot bodies frolicking around in the buff. And while I worship the female form, I believe exploitation definitely veers into the exploitive when only gorgeous women are on display while their male counterparts remain chastely buttoned up. Therefore, The Backside of Horror salutes the filmmakers and actors whom even up the score a bit by showing us instances of hot and juicy male flesh in their bloody celluloid fantasies.
After Jenny disappeared down that endless pothole and Matt met his fate at the claws of that errant werewolf, I finally caught up in that forth grade one legged tent pole race!
Similarly, after exposing enough female flesh to cover a football field in the first four low budget (surprisingly popular) early 90s Witchcraft entries, the producers finally wised up and gave the viewing world what it truly desired – some fresh and happy ass cheeks…of the male variety…in 1993’s Witchcraft V: Dance with the Devil!!
Here, the series’ holdover character William Spanner, in the handsome form of actor Marklen Kennedy, truly shook what the goddess gave him in an extended shower sequence.
Of course, this occurrence was just a momentary blip in this femme decorated collection. In the next several Witchcraft films, Spanner was as chastely covered as a Catholic priest. (Well, maybe that was not the analogy I was looking for. Oh, well…)
Until the next time, SWEET love and pink GRUE, Big Gay Horror Fan!
Recording artists like Frank Sinatra and Peggy Lee may have thought they understood the supernatural arts when caressing their vocal cords along Cy Coleman and Carolyn Leigh’s classic tune Witchcraft. But if they never watched one of the 90s B Movie films baring that name, then they actually knew nothing of the tormented, tedious joy that the guys of Astro Radio Z (including host/founder Derrick Carey, Mark Krawczyk, Glenn Randall Buettner and myself) have experienced in our cape shrouded viewing journeys.
Yes, this time we wicked cinephiles endured the vampiric, long lasting effects of Witchcraft5–8.
Whether you find us masters of insanity or just plain crazy, you might enjoy the results below: